What We Want

Recently one of my friends told me that I have charmed life, and when describing me to someone else said that I was someone who “gets whatever she wants”. My immediate reaction was to balk at that statement. Really, who wants to be labeled as the person who gets whatever they want? However, when I took a step back to look at that statement I was struck by at least a bit of truth in that statement.

Looking at my life the past couple years with the eyes of someone who isn’t aware of the inner workings of my heart I have to concede that it would indeed look like I get whatever I want. I wanted to go to England. I wanted to participate in the Disney College Program. I wanted to go to Johnson & Wales University. I wanted to be an RA. Check. Check, check, check.

This is where God stepped in, to keep me from beating myself up about being a spoiled brat or something. Can we take a few steps back to look at the process of the last couple years? Geez Louise, the waiting process for each of those things (with the shining exception of the RA process) was NOT FUN. If you’ve kept up with the blog you know about the struggles I have shared regarding each of those.

Let this be a quick time-out to say that I don’t want this post to come across as me knowing more than you or “Hey, look at me”, but to share something exciting that I think may have finally sunk in around January. This is probably old news for a lot of you more mature people, but it’s finally getting through to me.

Each of these awesome things God has allowed me to do were clearly in His will for my life. He is the one that is responsible for placing the desire to go to England, to work for Disney, to attend Johnson & Wales, and to be an RA in my heart. It finally hit me as I was going through the RA application process, that the point of praying is not for me to ask God to give me all the things that I want, but to ask Him to give me a desire for the things He wants. Um, WOW! Can it get better than that?

Really, if God is putting the things He desires for my life in my heart then we are already on the same page! Life becomes so much simpler when I stop asking for all sorts of crazy things and I don’t have to hand a dream over to God. He puts the dream and desire in my heart for me! This is such a relief. Knowing that God is working with me and in me to shape my life is such a source of peace and security. Guess what goes along with that peace and security? Joy!

Remember that word that I sort of “adopted” as my word for 2013? Yeah, it goes along with all of this! The more I have been digging into the Bible this year, the more connected I see things. Each of these key concepts, the Fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23) that is to be present in the lives of Christians are all completely interrelated. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Understanding a small part of all these qualities that God possesses and how they are connected in turn helps me to adopt them myself.

After that deep moment I really don’t have a good segue for this, so I’ll just begin. I’m an RA now. Yes, I’ll take a step back to explain how that happened. I did mention that I was going through the process to become an RA for the fall 2013 term at Johnson & Wales. So how did I end up as an RA a term early?

Most of you probably know that over the summer I looked for housing in hopes that I would be able to live close to school and not have to commute close to an hour and a half every day. This did not work out. At the time I told myself that it simply meant God had a better plan lined up for me in the future. Almost a throw away line. Pro-tip: God doesn’t “do” throw away lines.

Over the fall I continued to look for a place to live. Things continued to not work out. I continued to tell myself that there was something better still out there. When the RA information was posted in December I didn’t put too much stock into it. Honestly, after the last few experiences where I applied for something and wrestled through it I figured that if God wanted me to do it He would pave the way. (I’m finally learning!) And if it didn’t work out, well then, something better was out there. At no point did I really feel concerned, so I would like to say what I felt was peace coupled with an idea planted by God. Rather than being a dream that was given to me and I took ownership of, then was forced to hand back (like in the past), this time I let Him hold on to it the whole time.

January was comprised of several workshops and then a group interview on the final day. After group interviews the schedule was that the candidates would be informed if the Residential Life staff wished to conduct a personal interview before making a final hiring decision. The day of the group interview went well, I wasn’t stressed out and felt that I was able to provide fairly good answers to the questions I was asked. After the interview was finished a couple members of the Residential Life staff asked me and a few other candidates to stick around for a couple minutes.

It turns out that due to some unexpected changes, there were a few openings that needed to be filled at the beginning of the Spring term in just over a month, and would we be willing to jump in right away? Can I take a second to say that when God shows up with His “something better” He really shows up?

Obviously I said yes, moved up to Charlotte on March 2nd, and have been settling in and learning the ropes since then! This first week was somewhat stressful simply because it involved the start of a new semester, a move the day after coming back from a week in Florida (Perhaps we’ll get to that another time. More exciting things.), and battling a somewhat terrible cold. However, being here feels completely right. I’m feeling better, the only thing left from the cold is a bit of congestion.

So there you have it, things God has been teaching me AND a life update. As always, questions, comments, or additional thoughts are welcome. Thanks for reading, and if you want more details, just ask!


PS: Here’s a song that’s stuck in my head right now that I think is kind of a keeper http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjDojEOiMcE